Monday, March 23, 2009

Oh dear... kind of forgot about my blog there for a moment!

Whoa. I had promised myself that I wouldn't break away from my good blogging habits and I have! Oh noooooooz!

Derr. So, where do I begin exactly? For starters, tomorrow will be officially
2 MONTHS! I almost can't believe it but I'm damn proud of myself for getting this far and doing as well as I have. This is a very KUDOOSSSSS ME kind of moment and I'm going to make sure I have some sort of mini-Keri celebration... because I'm awesome like that.

Counseling has been going really well otherwise although I think for the summer I may be looking into going to a specialist. I'm coming to realize that although I've made so much progress on my own I'm still giving into my old habits wayyy too easily. I know that recovery takes a lot of time but I think the ED tendencies and ways of thinking are embedded much deeper into my nature than I thought. Like yesterday, for instance, I fasted until like 5 because I slept through my alarm and didn't get up at the time I wanted I had planned. Later that night I made sense as to why I did that (or "found the deeper meaning" as Leah would call it). The fact that I had lost control over my plans and my schedule had become completely messed up I immediately went to something that I KNEW I had control over. Essentially it was a form of self punishment. Because of this, I'm pretty sure I still have a lot of inner issues that I have to get straightened out still. One thing at a time though... counseling really is helping me so for now I'm just going to keep working at it!

This post was short... I'm awareee! But I have to go meet the ladies at Dalys! Edit-ness will happen when I get back. I swear!